The irony of self worth is that it has nothing to do with self. In preparation for an interview recently I was sent a series of questions. One was how I define self worth. That got me thinking and what I realized is that our self worth can be diminished by focusing on ourselves. When we are focused on ourselves we are more likely to wonder if we’re “good enough”, did a good enough job, are worth what we charge, etc. In our desire to be “good enough”, putting the spotlight on ourselves actually causes us to doubt our worth.
I know at speaking engagements, I have to stay completely focused on the audience and not myself to control the nerves. If I worry about whether I’ll be good enough, prepared enough, trip over my words (or feet), the nervousness increases. Honestly, as someone who public speaking does not come naturally to, I have to really work hard to get the attention off myself and MY nervousness and focus entirely on the audience. When I am fully committed to THEM and serving the audience I could trip and fall off the stage and as long as I get up and give valuable content, I don’t care what happens.
So I suspect our best opportunity to increase our self worth is getting the spotlight off ourselves and on those we can serve. A little ironic. We don’t have to look good, be perfect or amaze. We simply have to deliver.